A few days ago in the paper there was a list of "Cities in Pop Music" ..a sort of "League Table" of cities which have been "sung about" in songs. The top 10 is up there. They haven't made it clear if they meant " in song titles" or just somewhere in the lyrics ..which is odd... and vague ! Obviously, I immediately thought about what the list would be for birds. And I think we would have to restrict it to " in the title" We can't be expected to pick up on fleeting references to birds in the middle of songs ... nobody is listening carefully by then. No. There's two contrasting examples up there .... I expect that Nightingales would be well up in the " Most Frequent Bird in Song Titles" ranking , whereas Blue Jays rather further down in the list. Lovely though they are. The first thing I wondered was, how many birds can I think of that have appeared in song titles ... and there's a lot. Mockingbirds, robins, jays ( blue), loads of Nightingales, Blackbirds ( singing in the Dead of Night obviously), Hummingbirds,Chickens, Bluebirds, Albatrosses,(Jenny) Wrens, budgies, Eagles ..... loads !! But the next question I asked myself was, what would ,say, the "Top Ten Birds in Song Titles" actually be ? For a start, I thought most of them would be UK and USA birds ..they're the big hitters as far as popular music goes. But to think up a Top Ten .. that's tricky. Anyhow, I'm going have a go at it, and I hope you are too. And I'm not going to ask the computer either. Well, not until I've done my own anyway. So we'll make a bargain. If you show me yours, I'll show you mine !! Fair do's. Or as the Welsh say, Chwarae Teg ! Here's the bottom half of that City Songs League Table ...fascinating a stuff eh ?
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We shot up to Lancaster yesterday to meet up with Mr. G. at LM. And Mrs. G. And Sub-Lieutenant G. He also had that spiral staircase I told you about on his roof-rack ... he takes it everywhere just in case. Grippingly, he thinks he might, somewhere in the depths of his house, have copies of those two silly magazines I wrote, typed, drew and photocopied about 100 years ago and gave them all away. Just think ... if he does find them, I could put selected bits on here ..just to show you that I've always been as daft as I am now. Anyhow, this amused/bemused me .... and, I would think, everybody else........ What's all this about a "PALLATIVE SWIFT" then ? That's what we all wanted to know. Naturally, we scoured the reserve tirelessly to find this exotic item to no avail. We did see some nice clouds ... ..and lots of things that looked a bit like Bitterns but weren't ... that thing on the right in the incredible picture below turned out to be the ultra-rare Ginormous Wren, only ever previously glimpsed a few times in the Swamps of Java, which is coincidentally LM's local pub. .. and back in the pallative , hang on, palatial, tea-rooms, we all had a competition to see who could write down the most German words in 10 minutes... and I won. Oddly, Mr. G carried two scopes around the reserve ..well, I only saw two, he might have had more ... he let me have a look through both of them, not both at once of course,and he was a bit miffed when I got that snap of the Ginormous Wren before he could get on to it. Ha ! I suppose I'll have write a bloody description now. Bah. If I do, I'll do it the Joris Bohnson way ! 196-from-the-rarity-committees-files-joris-bohnsons-black-stork.html Naturally, we were all very tired by the time we got home, so we thought a few lullabies would be good to get us to sleep ... tell you what, let's have a listen to some right now ... I'll be showing you a posh castle soon ... here are the current occupants. A few days ago Me and The Significant Otter went to a posh house and had a look round. First off, there was a fenced-off room you weren't allowed into, and there was chess set on a posh table a good way away. I asked the attendant ,who was a lot bigger than me, and looked a bit menacing, if the set was the right way round. A lot of them aren't you know ! And it's not on ... it just increases entropy even more than usual. And we don't want that. Not a good idea. So we moved on .... well, the S.O. dragged me away...... Then I spotted this big painting ... and I was particularly interested in the lake and its occupants..... have a gander ( pun alert) for yourself ... A close look revealed that the swans had black bills .... I'm an inquisitive old Hector ! Hmmm ! Their eyes were very distinctly separate from the bill .... and the bills seems rather swollen the base. So ...what does that leave us with ID-wise ? I'll leave you with that to think about, while I put on here the song I should have put on yesterday .... "Au Paradis" ... and then I'll tell you what I think about them.... For a start, you've got to wonder how many black-billed swans were at large in the UK back when that was painted. It looked pretty old to me. 1800's ? Then, there's the question you've got to ask .... did the artist just make them up ? They do do that you know. They do they do ! They're a law unto themselves . And if they didn't, what can we narrow them down to .... here's the adults ... Trumpeter Tundra and here's their imm versions .... though there's quite a bit of variability ... Trumpeter Tundra But neither of those have that swollen upper bill that sticks out a mile in the painting. Maybe the artist had shaky hands, maybe his/her paint was blobby, maybe they're some sort of hybrid thingys, which aren't in the field guides because they don't count. Duck pond jobs.
Anyway, if you know, it would lighten my burden of things to be thinking about considerably. Maybe you live in the castle and know all about them.Lucky you. Another work colleague of mine ... Kurt Ruderling ... one of a longish string of " Me-Ferryers" ... used to cart me around in his car in the midday break to " places of interest" in the Barrow area. He preceded previous occupants of the post ( Driver-Around- Of- Me) by a few years. He wasn't really a "birder" but he was a biologist. That'll do . And believe me, there's plenty of "birding places of interest" around Barrow .. Walney Island for a start, then there's coastline on three sides of the peninsula, lots of waste land round the coast, there's also some big docks as well.... although I didn't get to know about them until the latter part of my Barrovian life. Some beggar hid them to keep riff-raff like me away. Thanks to him I heard Kate Bush for the first time on the juke box in a big pub on Walney...... what a revelation ! We didn't have a TV back then, not until I was 32 in fact . Ruderling was a Swiss national, and quite eccentric in many ways. For a start, he was a terrible driver. Many a time we would get back to what we laughingly called our "place of work" after a bit of bird-watching ashen-faced with fear ! I say "we" because we quite often had a bit of a retinue of female hangers-on, who unfortunately were hanging on to him rather than me. Plus .. he had a terrible memory, especially for important things. On several occasions he screeched the car to a halt and kicked us all out because he had forgotten he was supposed to be somewhere else ... and off he would zoom, leaving us to trudge back to work under our own steam. We laughed about it afterwards. But he increased my "Birding Radius Of Operation" considerably .... which was important. I don't recall seeing anything really remarkable, but we did see some goodish stuff, skuas and auks, various grebe sp, red throated divers,"good Gulls" that sort of stuff. A lot more than I was getting to see on foot. We didn't quite have the time to get to the Bird Reserve (ably run by Tim Dean at the time) and back in our dinner break, despite Ruderling's incredible ability to zoom along , not helped by the asymptotically increasing disastrousness of the state of the "access road" . But since then I've seen loads of top stuff there, and on Walney Island in general .... Black Stork, Desert Wheatear, Hudsonian Godwit, Greater Sand Plover,Woodchat Shrike ... to name just the most distinguished ones. Plus, every year he got a letter from the Swiss government, ordering him to make sure his rifle was being maintained and used regularly, because he had, by law, to return to Switzerland to do his 2 weeks National Service. He never did of course. But whilst he was worrying about it, he got even more erratic. So, Mr. Ruderling, I thank you for putting up with me over all those miles. What on earth would be an appropriate bit of music to go with that ? Well, that was all a long, long time ago ...and so is this .... Hey! Mr. Tambourine man, play a song for me I'm not sleepy and there is no place I'm going to Hey! Mr. Tambourine man, play a song for me In the jingle jangle morning I'll come following you Though I know that evening's empire has returned into sand Vanished from my hand Left me blindly here to stand but still not sleeping My weariness amazes me, I'm branded on my feet I have no one to meet And the ancient empty street's too dead for dreaming Hey! Mr. Tambourine man, play a song for me I'm not sleepy and there is no place I'm going to Hey! Mr. Tambourine man, play a song for me In the jingle jangle morning I'll come following you Take me on a trip upon your magic swirling ship My senses have been stripped My hands can't feel to grip My toes too numb to step Wait only for my boot heels to be wandering I'm ready to go anywhere, I'm ready for to fade Into my own parade Cast your dancing spell my way, I promise to go under it Hey! Mr. Tambourine man, play a song for me I'm not sleepy and there is no place I'm going to Hey! Mr. Tambourine man, play a song for me In the jingle jangle morning I'll come following you Though you might hear laughing, spinning, swinging madly across the sun It's not aimed at anyone It's just escaping on the run And but for the sky there are no fences facing And if you hear vague traces of skipping reels of rhyme To your tambourine in time It's just a ragged clown behind I wouldn't pay it any mind It's just a shadow you're seeing that he's chasing Hey! Mr. Tambourine man, play a song for me I'm not sleepy and there is no place I'm going to Hey! Mr. Tambourine man, play a song for me In the jingle jangle morning I'll come following you And take me disappearing through the smoke rings of my mind Down the foggy ruins of time Far past the frozen leaves The haunted frightened trees Out to the windy beach Far from the twisted reach of crazy sorrow Yes, to dance beneath the diamond sky With one hand waving free Silhouetted by the sea Circled by the circus sands With all memory and fate Driven deep beneath the waves Let me forget about today until tomorrow Hey! Mr. Tambourine man, play a song for me I'm not sleepy and there is no place I'm going to Hey! Mr. Tambourine man, play a song for me In the jingle jangle morning I'll come following you ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Everybody should get to read his "autobiography" .. Chronicles ( one).
When I heard that he'd won the Nobel Prize for Literature, I naturally assumed it was for that book. It's like no other biography I've ever read .... or any other book of any sort I've read. Look it up on Amazon and read the reviews if you don't believe me..... here's a couple ... The 1st one .. Eminently readable, richly textured with americana, old blues and an idiosyncratic use of Language Bob Dylan's first [and only?] volume of memoirs has been written in a style which leaves as many questions unanswered as any of the songs he has written. These are memoirs in the true sense of the word sudden flashes of illumination on parts of social and musical history that burn through the pages right down to the cover leaving the reader excited and perplexed. If you want to know who Bob Dylan IS this is not the book that will tell you - unless you construct him from numerous references, asides, recollections and name-checks. A book that nobody but Dylan could have written chronicling an age which, to his later fans, may be as weird and old as the world of The American Anthology of Folk Music summoned up with reference to The Basement Tapes by Greil Marcus. Dylan writes his songs, it's been claimed, in one sitting. This book is a series of songs, some old, some new, some impenatrable but every one of them essential. Will we see a Chronicles II? Maybe only in The Bible - which may have been the source for the title of this small masterpiece. Read it. Here's the 2nd one ... Here it is from the man himself. What wonderful prose that just f-l-o-w-s. Paints pictures with words - you share the presence. On my doorstep when I got home from work, I picked it up and read it in one session - literally, un-put-downable! I now have a deeper insight to the man that was an ever present influence in my life, and continues to be so. I read incessantly and this is one of the most beautiful works I have ever read. I wouldn't want immortality for myself, but I wish it on his Bobness because we and our descendants need him! I sound like a nerd but Mr Zimmerman's work, once fully studied, can do that to you. His clarity of vision is crystal. He'll help you understand it all. Incidentally - once again supersonic delivery, at well under high street shelf price. Buy it and read it all - that's an order! I will be asking questions later. I don't know where this came from, or who drew it, but I'm pretty sure it wasn't me. But I like it anyway ..so here it is ... if I remember, I'll tell you. (Well luckily, Mr. G has told me whom the artist was ... it was him !! ) A CAUTIONARY TALE Have you ever tried to tell someone that they've got their ID wrong, Its bill is much too short, and the legs are much too long ? You know it won't do any good, but you really must persist. 'cos if you don't, it's you that's going to have the shortest list. Have you tried to explain to a halfwit, that it's not a Pratincole That's feeding on her peanuts , and eating a sausage roll ? If so, you're a braver man than me, or maybe you like a fight, The best thing's to point out to her that it's much more like a Twite. In a hide at Titchwell years ago, there were Redshanks by the ton, But a smartarse shouted "Spotted", and he was certain it was one. I told him why it wasn't, why he was wrong, and I was right, , And that is why, for the last two years, I've had nightmares every night. ( Worry not, the plaster's off , and I can walk to the canteen but my face is now so ugly, I have to eat behind a screen) And that Black-throated Diver, well, I've written all about it It was really just a Cormorant, and she was half a halfwit And she told me that my binoculars were totally decrepit She said it had been ID'd by a man who knew everything about it for his South American experience was superior to mine ..and his binoculars, she told me, were really mighty fine. I took my leave of the daft old bag, my confidence was shattered and staggered back to my clapped-out car, nothing no longer mattered, and threw my Zeiss binoculars into the nearest bin and decided I would chuck this stupid birding business in. So, readers of this sorry tale, try to keep your hooters out of any birding dispute , whatever it's about. Let the silly bugger make mistakes and get things wrong Just let him think he's got it right, and jolly him along After all, it matters, not two bloody hoots, whatever he wants to call it Because we are the experts, and he is just a nitwit ! By the way, don't worry, I got my bins back right away I picked them up on my way to work, no problem, the next day, There'll be no I.D. arguments from me, no bitter rows Because we always get things right, but they are stupid cows ! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ I thank you ! If you want to read about that "Black-throated Diver" incident, it's on the other end of this handy link ... and it really happened ... to me .... 50-the-man-with-the-proper-binoculars.html After all that ... this .. Radiohead " The Numbers" .. in a pastoral setting too. While I was writing this in my luxurious study, I noticed that various adverts were appearing on the post itself and in the sidebar. But when I looked at the published version they weren't there. Are you seeing them when you read the published blog ?
I've had a look at it as an "outsider" but there aren't any .... but I'm still doing it from my computer. I'd really like to know. I don't want adverts on here. Let me know either way .... either as a comment, or at [email protected] Regular readers have already been entertained by my new " Problem Page" in which I try to help those with birding-related issues .... but this new "Correspondence" page allows me to deal quickly with the swathes of less important matters with which I am constantly pestered. It is usual to just give the answers to that sort of thing ... Mr. "S " , Market Drayton ..... No, you shouldn't put saucepans of boiling water out for the birds .... I know you say that it will stop germs, but it stops everything else as well. "Queeny", Runcorn ...... so you are catching your garden birds and giving them a good scrub with carbolic every day are you !? Then you must desist at once, forthwith, and now. What sort of idiot are you ? If you've got lots of it left over, why not try having some for breakfast ? " Reg", Wirral ..... if your house is so full of birds that you can't see the walls, it's your own stupid fault. Even the letter you sent me is covered with bird droppings. Just close the bloody doors. CLOSE THE BLOODY DOORS, " Worried", Leeds ... I see. You've been studying the sun through your birding scope have you. And now you mysteriously can't see anything. Well well. That's probably because it's burned your retinas to a frazzle due to your own stupidity. Haven't you ever heard of the Darwin Awards ? Just to make it clear, the ointment you've bought is not going to do you any good. Why not try eating it instead ? By the way, you'll need to get a friend to read this to you. CM, Kidderminster .... you can't do that sort of thing with any female, you fool. I think you have been misled by some ill-educated people referring to women as "birds." Human females is what you should be doing it with. Not that a twerp like you is in with a chance. Thank goodness. Anonymous ..... So ... you've cut up your Field Guide and rearranged the birds in alphabetical order. Why don't you go a step further and cut yourself up and arrange your whole body in alphabetical order, you dolt ! It would probably be a big improvement, and you'd probably be talking through your arse, which would be just below your ankles. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Well readers, as you can imagine, it's hard work trying to sort these prats out. Let's get back to some sort of sanity with a bit of lovely music ... Alain Bashung ... " Volutes" ... note the clever punning title there ! Vos luttes partent en fumée Vos luttes font des nuées Des nuées de scrupules Vos luttes partent en fumée Vers des flûtes enchantées Et de cruelles espérances Me lancent Des dagues et des lances En toute innocence J’cloue des clous sur des nuages Un marteau au fond du garage J’cloue des clous sur des nuages Sans échafaudage Vos luttes partent en fumée Sous les yeux embués D’étranges libellules Pour une grimace et un rictus De plus J’fais des heures sup’ Je m’en donne de la peine Je cogite je m’agite Je rejoue la scène J’cloue des clous sur des nuages Un marteau au fond du garage J’cloue des clous sur des nuages Sans échafaudage Et mon corps de se vouer A des lunes surdouées Aux courbes souveraines Pleines pleines Vos luttes partent en fumée Sous des soleils qui s’ignorent Dor- dormez Mes réponses allongées Mes que dire Mes que faire Mais comment ça tient en l’air Ces deux hémisphères Par quel mystère J’cloue des clous sur des nuages Un marteau au fond du garage J’cloue des clous sur des nuages Sans échafaudage Vos luttes partent en fumée ankles arms arse brain bum chin ears eyes feet fingers gob gums hair knees legs lips nails navel neck nipples nose teeth thumbs toes tum What a terrible way to arrange yourself ... your bum between your brain and your chin,your ankles right at the top , your nipples over your nose and your eyes just above your feet. Here's where I got the idea for those silly letters ..... this was over 120 years ago ! He told them straight ... and I intend to do the same !
That brilliant drawing of various eggs of British birds is a plate from that ancient ( 1895-ish) and huge Boys Own Paper Annual. No doubt egg collecting was big back then ...... mainstream . But ... I wonder how many of even our current top birders could recognise ... unless they were in some niche occupation like, er, breeding bird surveys, but they would either be surveys of nest-boxed woods or sea-cliff colonies with a limited number of species, or be done by song recognition these days. I think it would be hardly any. Museum ornithologists would have a better chance ,,,, but how many of them are there ? How many would you get ? And how confident would you be they were right ? As for me, I think I know 2 of them for (almost) certain, and maybe 3 more possibles. But I wouldn't bet much on any of them being right. Well, you'll see what they are after the music spot . And if you get more than I did, well .. I don't mind .... I bet you're impressed with the "double appropriateness" there ! I'm putting another of my irrelevant snaps here so you don't see the "egg list" too soon...... Here they are ... assuming that "they" got them right !
Sorry about the first few ... I've just noticed that they seem to have got lopped off .... I'll bung them on later .... I found this front cover inside an old file of mine.... most impressive I reckon. Has anyone out there seen a similar thing for other places .. like England for example ? Or counties would be good. Oh yes !! It must be a very intricate thing to type. A New England ! Well, one of them. I mentioned a book that I wanted to include but couldn't find...well, I've found it. I had the "Wrong Search Image." Oh yes. It's pretty much the same format as " Evenings at the Coot and Corncrake" that is, stories and quizzes, but it's called " A Bird-Watcher's Quiz Book" ... but for me, it's the stories that stand out. Any fool ... like me ... can write quizzes.... e.g... here's two of mine , wot I've just thought of .... [a] What's the UK-list bird that uses the most different letters in its name ? ... for example, Gannet has only 5 different ones ... a, e, g, n, t. .. and Willow Warbler only uses a, b, e, i, l, o, r, w = 8 .... crap !! [b] If you had 26 alphabet tiles, one for each letter, what's the longest UK-list bird you could spell out with them ? They look like very similar questions ,but they're not. I await your answers with baited breath . Here's the book ... There's 15 of them for sale on Amazon at 1p + postage. I recommend it to you ! In case you haven't seen my terrific 12" Birding Bookshelf, the idea was that you've only got 12" of shelf for all your bird books ... so you'd better make a really good choice 'cos that's your lot, buster ! Here's mine ..... selected after a lot of thought and a lot of tough decisions ... oh, the agony ! As you can see, I've gone for entertainment over knowledge ! Mainly. I'm going to put today's new book in that gap I've left on the right there. Here they are all flattened out so you can see better what they are ... Oh, I'm truly a shallow old Hector ! Another idea was, you could select your own 12" Birding Bookshelf ... and even better, you could send it to me, a nice photo, that sort of thing, and I could [i] get some good ideas from it and/or [ii] stick it on here so that others could do the same. Nobody's sent me any yet, and I'm feeling a bit neglected. Hey, here's my Welsh 12" bookshelf ... you'll love it ! It also displays my shallowness. I might inflict the German one on you when you're not looking. But ... 'tis music time.... very appropriate this ... Klee ... Zwei Fragen ( 2 questions) .. Ein neuer Tag Ein neues Leben Ein neues Spiel Mit neuen Regeln Ich seh dich an Und kenn dich nicht Do siehst mich an Und kennst mich nicht Und wenn ich dich 2 Fragen fragen würde Wär das Woran glaubst do? Und wofür lebst do? Und wenn do mich 2 Fragen fragen würdest Wär das: Woran denkst do? Und wohin gehst do? Ein klarer Blick In dein Gesicht Ein wahres Wort Vergissmeinnicht Und wenn ich dich 2 Fragen fragen würde Wär das: Woran glaubst do? Und wofür lebst do? Und wenn do mich 2 Fragen fragen würdest Wär das Woran denkst do? Und wohin gehst do? Und wenn ich dich 2 Fragen fragen würde Wär das Woran glaubst do? Und wofür lebst do? Woran glaubst do? Und wofür lebst do? ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Here's the "answer" to a question I going to ask you in 1 year into the future !!! Sorted !!!
This was the sky above our street yesterday afternoon ... pretty dramatic ! I try to get to watch the BBC1 forecast in the morning ... and there's lots of good things about it ( unlike on ITV, which consists usually of a 3 hr advert for toothpaste ,about 20 seconds for the crap forecast presented by a twit, then a 30-second trailer for some shite programme like "Gove Island".. god help us all if that ever gets on)( but he/she probably won't). BUT .. I do have one criticism.... after all, on my passport under " Occupation" I've put "Professional Controversialist." Ha !! And here is my criticism ... they tell you today's forecast. Fair enough. ( That's not the forecast.... well sometimes it is .. it's my assessment of it.) Then they do tomorrow's forecast. They do it with the same blithe confidence with which they did today's ! But let's face it, they often get today's wrong. So tomorrow's forecast should be qualified in some way. They might mention that it's maybe not as certain as today's. But they don't. Then things get seriously silly... ...they tell you the next day's forecast ... and the next ... then the weekend forecast. OK, they might express the occasional reservation as to its reliability, but not as much as they should. Nothing like as much. So ..here's my solution ... hello BBC ... it's free of charge..... you're welcome . Here's what "they" should do .... ..as the forecast delves deeper and deeper into the mysterious future weather, the sound should get quieter and quieter, and the picture fainter and fainter until the whole caboodle just grinds into silence and darkness. That would give the whole thing a more sensible tone I think. But over the last few years, there has been one good trend. In general, by and large, the weather is usually better than the forecast. It's been like that ever since that huge gaffe with the "Hurricane" that "they" said wasn't a hurricane, and then whatever it actually was, whatever they cared to call it, it still flattened vast swathes of the south !! How us Northeners laughed !! Mind you, up here it's hard to tell "laughter" from the hacking cough produced by Tuberculosis and all those other things that we seem to get more of. By the way, wouldn't it be lovely if ,when "they" first thought up "Love Island" , it got misprinted as " Gove Island" and that got made instead !! Paradise on a stick ! And the music today is going to be a sort of weather forecast ... Manu ... "Un beau Jour" ( jour de vent)... Un beau jour Jour de vent De sable entre les doigts Et de sourires en grand Et cette fossette sur ta joue Et tes yeux qui mangent tout C'que tu vois et que tu me racontes Je ne m'en lasse pas Un beau jour Jour de pluie Tes petits pieds dans les flaques Et ton rire comme une claque Et cette fossette sur ta joue Et tes yeux qui mangent tout Tout à apprendre et que tu me demandes Je ne m'en lasse pas Et cette fossette sur ta joue Et tes yeux qui mangent tout C'que tu vois et que tu me racontes Je ne m'en lasse pas Un beau jour Grâce à toi ... That's the children's forecast ... Sweep = anemometer! Strong easterly by the look of it.
That image of the "Gove Island" programme is going to haunt me all day. |
AuthorThat's the author up there ... I was young and sprightly then. Archives
October 2022
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