Me, and various other people, whooshed eastwards one day to tick a Glossy Ibis .... and when we got there, we could see the line of birders in the distance. And one bloke walked up to us and told us it was very close and giving excellent views. That's it up there by the way. Even I managed to get a good(ish) picture of it. Aha ! So Ziggy, one of the birders in the car, immediately told us that he wasn't going to see it ... it was much too tame and obviously an escape ! And sure enough, he didn't !!! But we, of course, did. He sat in the car for 40 minutes . It takes all sorts. So that was one thing. So ...there we were , on the way back, trundling into Huddersfield,or Halifax, or wherever it was, but it began with H, and Ziggy suddenly came out of his sulk and said... hey, let's play Foxy Chicks !! Foxy Chicks, surprise surprise, turned out to be an in-car game in which the people on one side of the car were in competition with those on the other side of the car to spot as many beautiful women as they could. It makes sense actually ... when you're out of the city, you can do your spotting and ticking and the like, with actual birds. And when you get into town, that doesn't really work so well ... and as we all know, males have a very very very low boredom threshold, so they have to do something, so they, er, look at women. So, that's an alternative to the far more intellectual " ghostbirds" that I showed you a little while ago... and more politically correct as well. The choice, dear readers, is yours. One thing we can be certain of ... this wouldn't ever happen the other way round ... females competing to "collect" attractive males to score points. No way ... well, maybe they would. Er .. perhaps. And ..once again, I'm completely stuck for an appropriate bit of music .... Ziggy, by the way , gripped me off something rotten many years ago .... he was shacked up in a cottage just 10 minutes walk from my house, with one of his string of Foxy Chicks no doubt, when he looked out of said cottage window and there was a blasted Wryneck cavorting around outside. Did he whizz round to my house and tell me .. No. Did I dip out totally and disastrously .. Yes . Did I spend hours looking for it ? Yes. Did he take great glee in showing me all the brilliant pictures he had taken of it > YES. Bah. Grrrr. Dam and Blarst.
0 Comments
I wrote this next paragraph a few days ago ... on that post about the various stages in my attempts to "rat-proof" our bird feeder.... I'll bung the picture I used on here again ..one picture is worth a thousand words ... especially mine ... "The "Mark 2" ... I added to my cunning plan an ancient Frisbee .... drilled a hole in it, and attached it ½ way along said slippery string. ... and as far as I could be sure, it worked, Rat-wise. But .... the birds didn't like it either .... they like to be able to see all around all the time so they don't get zonked by Sparrowhawks etc. It's happened quite a few times, in the garden, and that just the ones we saw." ..and as you can see, the next stage was to shove the frisbee further up .. and the Mark 3 was created .... and I moved the whole thing and hung it up from a high branch of our Eucalyptus, so I could push the frisbee even further up from the feeder so the birds could look around more easily, and also give any potential rats a far harder, longer and slippier descent .... aha !! BUT ... .. Well ! Just a few minutes ago I was eating my "breakfast of chumpy-ones" watching the feeder, and thinking .. .. ""compared to where it used to be, close in to the hedge, as opposed to where it is now, further out into the garden, it's just asking for a Sparrowhawk to come whooshing through." And, believe it or not, about a second later that very thing happened ! It might have been less than a second. It was a big female .... and luckily nothing was at the feeder at the time, but it was an impressive sight. Whoosh ! So .... I might have to think of a way to move the whole thing nearer to some cover. But ... it has got Sparrowhawk onto my "November '18 Garden Birds List" which is a bonus. And Sparrowhawks need .. er ... Sparrows ! Here's another picture of the Current Contraption Configurational Concept .... I don't suppose I'll be able to think of anything appropriate .... A couple of posts ago I told you all about my attempts to stop rats hogging all the bird food. It's got little drawings of my various attempts as well .... why not nip back and take a gander ? ( Please note the cunning pun) And I promised you some updates. So here they are ... Well, as far as my observations go, no rats have managed to eat any of it ... my home-assembled rat-exclusion contraption seems to work. And unlike my first attempts, the birds now seem happy with it.... one of the first to use the peanut feeder was a smashing Gt. Spot. Excellent. But ... as for the rats, I haven't actually seen any at all over the last couple of days ... so I'm not sure what's happened.... as opposed to seeing them quite often each day and the cat catching quite a few as well. It's quite possible that somebody up the street could have got rid of them by some means or another ... or maybe the cat has caught them all.. we only know about the ones he brings into the house. I won't really know for sure that the contraption is working until I see a rat failing to reach the peanut feeder. You know .. turning back, falling off ....that's the acid test. But so far, I haven't. Anyhow, this morning, cold, wettish, windy ... I decided to have a walk down by the flood. Nothing much on it, but venturing further I saw 4 Egyptian Geese way away in a field .... then on the way back there were ± 6 Tree Sparrows progressing through the innards of a hedge..... excellent ... and a bit later on, at least a dozen Fieldfares processing along the tops of the long line of bushes at the side of the Flood. All excellent stuff. But by that time I was cold, damp and windblown .... so I whizzed back home. I photographed the Egyptians, but they were a long way off.... as you have seen from that photo up at the top ... but I did that "hold the camera up to your binoculars" trick and I got ... well, it's not brilliant is it ! And early this morning ( 0720) ... because I'm writing this the next morning ... around 180 pinks flew high over the house ... right into a strong easterly wind. ...I forgot to put the music on yesterday... so here it is .... Francis Cabrel ... "Il Faudrait leur dire" ... but the real reason for putting on this fine French love song is that Mr. G ... remember him ? .. seems to be playing the piano !!! Are there no limits to his talents ? In case you've forgotten about my "Mr. G" article, here's the link to it .... 60-birding-eccentrics-1-mr-g.html Having given you all a wonderful opportunity to experience my sheer incompetence by showing you an ancient list of "Hoodwinks" that I had encountered, I think it's time to go the whole hog and show you the second instalment of this sorry mess ... and here it is .... there's a hefty overlap by the way, the "new" stuff doesn't start till 13/11/96 ... but I daresay you'll quite enjoy re-reading the embarassing ineptitudinal stuff before it ... squeaky toys, irritating "chirrups", possible quiet chups, high-pitched whistles, mysterious goose-like objects, and, of course, a "rising groan." I've done a few of those myself. And I expect you have too................ off we go then ... This next bit has some conkers ! Rattlings, Buglings, ( or should it be "bunglings?) , really loud "pinks", hugely amplified chaffinches, double-speed Nuthatches, mystery warbers.... and a HUGE ESCAPE ! Crumbs. !! Right ... I'll creep away and hide somewhere for a bit.... I couldn't think of a good song to go with all that .... but, experience , they say, is cheap at any price, so here's a Kate Bush song sequence which is a remarkable experience in itself ...... transcendent .. Over the past few weeks Mini-Birding Towers has had what the Bible would call A Surfeit of Rats. The Cat, Lupin, has caught at least 6 of them, three of which he has carted through the cat-flat into the house. Actually, I'm a great admirer of Rats .. they were here long before us, and they'll be here long after us .... and they do what they're designed to do ..unlike us. However, I have been goaded into action, of a sort, by, er, factors ... [a] The Domestic Factor .... The Significant Otter wants rid of them. [b] The Economic Factor.....They're eating all the bird food. [c] The Birding Reason ... The birds aren't... the rats scare them off. [d] The Other Reason .... The S.O. is ashamed of having rats around. So .... what have I done, in an "interventionist" sort of way ? Well, I've been trying to prevent them from eating the bird food .... have a look at this amazing step-by-step approach .... by the way, I had a lot of trouble with the photographs in yesterday's article .... they kept disappearing, and/or not appearing at all. I solved (?) it eventually by the usual male method of piddling round with the "edit" thing until , for no reason known to me, they started to work again. It seems to be OK today ... so far .... The Mark 1 ... I just used a long thin slippery plastic rope .. the rats had a tough old time getting down it, but they did .. so that didn't work. Rats ! The Mark 2 ... I added to my cunning plan an ancient Frisbee .... drilled a hole in it, and attached it ½ way along said slippery string. ... and as far as I could be sure, it worked, Rat-wise. But .... the birds didn't like it either .... they like to be able to see all around all the time so they don't get zonked by Sparrowhawks etc. It's happened quite a few times, in the garden, and that just the ones we saw. So .. I did two things.... I moved the Frisbee further up, in the hope they wouldn't mind it so much. And, I transferred the whole caboodle to a high branch of our stately Eucalyptus .... I've only just finished that arduous task so I don't know how it's going. Here it is in full Spudgycolour .. The Mark 3 !!! A bird's Eye View as well. Which is as it should be. It's a bit vertiginous ... if a Rat does get down there, it's going to feel a bit dodgy, I hope..... Here's the Mark 4 .... with added FAT. But will it do its allotted task ? There will be updates. And while you're all waiting anxiously to see what happens, I hope you'll be assembling your own, personal "Foot of Books" as talked about in the previous photo-troubled post .... and then you'll send me a picture of it/them. I certainly enjoyed making my selection .... apart from rather gormlessly choosing the same book twice in the my initial line-up ? Doh ! Bah ! Then I can "curate" them !! That's what "they" do these days. I'm dashing off now to see how things are going Rat/Fat wise ...here's your bit of Relevant Music ..... it's by The Postal Service, and the singer is the singer from Death Cab for Cutie .... " Such Great Heights" .. and here's the "singalong" words video ... and yes, I know it's been on here before, but it's a lovely song .... This morning, very briefly, I heard a bit on the radio about a " Five Foot Shelf" which Charles W. Eliot ( President of Harvard, and T.S. Eliot's cousin) claimed could hold enough books for a complete liberal education. As a result of this, the recommended five-feet-of-books was actually put on the market as a ready-made collection. So... of course, I thought to myself ... hey, what about bird books !? I suppose, it being a much more restricted field of knowledge compared to the whole of world literature, we would have to have a smaller shelf ... So, dear readers ..... if you had only 1 foot (30cm) of shelf space, which Birding-related books would you choose to fill it ? I think it's a tricky challenge ....... Come to think of it, it's a bit like that Desert Island Disc thing ... they get given the bible ( or equivalent) and just 1 other book. BUT .... you're getting a whole FOOT of shelf, you jammy devils. Anyway, I'm going to assemble my foots-worth ... well, assuming I can find the ones I want .. it's not guaranteed. And I'll photograph my line-up, in fact I already have ..... so here it is. It's not perfect, because I suspect there's some better alternatives that I haven't remembered yet. Here we go then ... I hope you're impressed, especially with the cleverly-placed 12" ruler .... Notice also the little space I've left at the right side .... that's because I wanted to include the 2nd volume of "Evenings at the Coot and Corncrake" but I couldn't find it. Mind you, I'm not totally sure there is such a thing, but I think there is, and I think I've got it ..somewhere. No doubt you're thinking .... he's a shallow type of gump. Well, I don't care ... if I'm only allowed 12" of books, I want some fun, entertainment, enjoyment of the familiar, trusty books I know I can read again and again. So, shallow it shall be. Fair do's though, chwarae teg, there are two serious-ish books. So there. More than two, actually. I bet you're wondering what that very thin green book at 3rd from the left is ... it's one I've written about on here a little while ago ... and now's your big chance to see it on this specially re-arranged rearrangement of those same books ... It's called British Birding 1984, and I wrote about it here ... 251-another-brilliant-birding-book-youve-never-heard-of.html But what I'd really like, is for you to make your own 12" selection and then send them in and we'll have a gallery of them. email › [email protected] Or not .. it all depends on you. And now, after all that, a song from Wir sind Helden ( We are Heroes) Für nichts garantieren .... and it's a words video, so you can sing along ... This picture was voted as " Photograph of the Week" in the latest issue of " Starling Weekly" ..available at most leading newsagents.... Here's another "thing" from that huge unremembered ring-binder crammed with early 90's bird notes etc. Truly, I don't remember writing any of it. How I could possibly have managed to do all that birding to generate all that scribbling at the same time as doing a high-workload full-time job ? I mean, would you be able to do it if you were a professional sheet-metal origamist, twisting great chunks of steel plate into little folded wrens and Ostriches ? No, you wouldn't ... so I'm glad that wasn't my job ... it nearly was, but at the interview they found out I had failed O Level Japanese so I was booted out.I did eventually work with folded paper, as a newsagent in Outer Tadcaster. Anyhow, here's a jolly chunk from that file ... this is the first bit of the "Hoodwinks" section, where I've written about all the birds ( well, they might have been birds) that I simply had no idea as to what they were. I notice that I've later added "escapes" the the title as well. Reading them will be an opportunity to have a good laugh at my gormlessness. Fair enough .. but I'm sure many of you out there have made similar mistakes. And if you haven't, you have my total respect. I was living on the outskirts of Lancaster then, by the way. There's one or two in there told to me by various neighbours. I remember that one at the top very well.... it's that age old problem ... was it a Golden Oriole or the paper boy ? These days I would have dismissed some of these as squirrels ... but there were no squirrels where I lived back then. And for some of them I've put in later suggestions ... like that last one of '93. And that " cat-like mewing" ... well, it could, I suppose, have been ,er ,a cat ! I can't help thinking that when you've read this, my last shreds of credibility will have crumbled to nought. Or nout, if you've read the previous post. ..apologies for the slight overlaps ... this next has a potential Trumpeter Finch ( most likely a toy trumpet, or somebody blowing their nose ), a dodgy bit of seawatching over-enthusiasm, some wagtails that I've tried to improve on and a dead cert Budgie ! And more ..... ... you will be shocked to hear that there's more of that ... quite a bit more ... but I'll give you a while to calm down and/or stop laughing before the next lot takes you by surprise. Let's have a bit of music now..... let's have another person I've encountered.... I was in the same airport waiting lounge with Feargal Sharkey once .. .so we'll have something by him .... there's some very appropriate lines in this song ... " A Good Heart" .. I hear a lot of stories, I suppose they could be true
All about love and what it can do for you High is the risk of striking out, the risk of getting hurt And still I have so much to learn Well I know 'cause I think about it all the time I know that real love is hard to find And a good heart these days is hard to find True love, the lasting kind A good heart these days is hard to find So please be gentle with this heart of mine My expectations may be high, I blame it on my youth Soon enough I'll learn the painful truth I'll face it like a fighter then boast how I've grown Anything is better than being alone Well I know 'cause I learn a little every day I know 'cause I listen when the experts say that That a good heart these days is hard to find True love, the lasting kind A good heart these days is hard to find So please be gentle with this heart of mine As I reflect on all my childhood dreams My ideas of love weren't as foolish as they seemed If I don't start looking now I'll be left behind And a good heart these days, it's hard to find I know, it's a dream I'm willing to defend I know it will be worth it in the end A good heart these days is hard to find True love, the lasting kind A good heart these days is hard to find So please be gentle with this heart of mine A good heart these days is hard to find True love, the lasting kind A good heart these days is hard to find So please be gentle with this heart With this heart of mine I find it hard (baby, baby) I find it hard I find it hard I find it hard I find it hard (baby, baby) I find it hard I find it hard ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ This one, again by me, came 2nd. Well.. here's a poem about the Rhea ...as you mit have guessed. It started life as a rou draut, and nearly came to nout, but now, here it is .... in the full lit of day .... The Rhea has, unfortunately, lost the power of Flit But, despite his dreadful loss he is a truly awesome Sit We keep ours in the garden, but he comes indoors most Nits It's all because he once was scared by the awesome Northern Lits. One problem is, the cat and him, they love to have a Fit They make an awful racket, and it lasts most of the Nit They're both terrific Fiters, the results are very Tit If they were real professionals, their future would be Brit. (But sometimes, outside in the rain, he yields a mournful Si And we can only wonder, does he think his end is Ni ?) Another thing about him is, his IQ = Nout They haven't really helped at all, all those textbooks that we've Bout We've tried all different sorts of foods, like Jam and Tripe and Dou To Briten up his dinky brain, but it didn't work, Althou, Maybe the quantities we served were never quite Enou. So, if you decide to keep a Rhea, the going might be Tou I've mentioned how he likes a Fit, he really could get Rou So we've given ours to the bloke next door, Norman Barraclou ! When dead, I've heard, the Rhea often comes back as a ost But I never would believe such guff, I would have to be a fool So, just to check I've written to the Saturday Evening Post. And they've told me, reliably, that they come back as a oul ! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ There is, you'll be glad to hear, another Rhea poem (?) in the pipeline, so at least you've got something to look forward to. I bet you didn't know that poems were kept in a trou while they were still in their rou form, then put into said pipeline. I've got one about Captain Bli that's been in there for weeks. Oh, and another about the Chou .... I must get that one finished. This bit of music should have gone with yesterday's harticule ... Stiff Little Fingers .. " Alternative Ulster" ... Rou, Tou and more than Enou ! Early vinyl copies are much sout after, I believe. There's nothin' for us in Belfast
The Pound's old, and that's a pity OK, so there's the Trident in Bangor And then you walk back to the city We ain't got nothin' but they don't really care They don't even know you know They just want money, we can take it or leave it What we need Is an Alternative Ulster Grab it and change it, it's yours Get an Alternative Ulster Ignore the bores and their laws Get an Alternative Ulster Be an anti-security force Alter your native Ulster Alter your native land Take a look where you're livin' You got the army on the street And the R-U-C dog of repression Is barking at your feet Is this the kind of place you want to live? Is this where you want to be? Is this the only life we're gonna have? What we need Is an Alternative Ulster Grab it and change it, it's yours Get an Alternative Ulster Ignore the bores and their laws Get an Alternative Ulster Be an anti-security force Alter your native Ulster Alter your native land They say they're a part of you And that's not true, you know They say they've got control of you And that's a lie, you know They say you will never Be free, free, free Alternative Ulster Alternative Ulster Alternative Ulster Alternative Ulster Oh, you've done it now! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Another result of the constant turmoil at Mini-Birding Towers is the occasional turnup of ancient things .... and yesterday I "turned up" a big ring-binder full of birding notes that I couldn't even remember writing. Truly. It was all stuff from the nineties. And ...at the back I found a single sheet with a list of birds I'd dreamt about... and it had some that weren't on that list I put on here a few posts ago ( #255). In fact. all were new , except the " Hobby" one and the " Spoonbill + 2 Cormorants" one. Here it is ...... yes, my handwriting has always been crap. So ... here's the original list I posted before, with the "new" stuff in red ... ... remember, these were things I dreamed about .... not real sightings. There is a difference ... but some people haven't quite grasped it yet! [1] Bee-eater .... several of them actually ... all in the one dream. [2] Redleg Partridge + Black Stork ... yes, both in the same dream. No idea how. ( The "new" list has Black Grouse not Black Stork ! And a date ..6/5/94/95/96) It's possible they might have been two different dreams (?) [3] Spoonbill. .. it flew over the canal with 2 Cormorants ! In the dream, that is. ( 9/11/96) [4] Hobby. Sitting on a branch low down in a tree. ( 7th May 94/95/96?) [5] Swift ... 25/10/93 [6] ?? "browny heron + possible Chough .. present on a school field 8/1/94 [7] 17/11/93 ... Wigeon. ( What an exciting dream that must have been !) [8] Redwing, Wren, Black Redstart (fall ?) 3/12/93 [9] Weird "american" Buntings ? ?/4/97. [10] Alpine Swift ?/10/97 That brings the numbers up a bit ... 15, maybe 16 species, depending on Black Grouse/Black Stork business. And here's an odd thing ... 6 of those species began with a B .... and three of them were black ... Black Redstart, Black Stork, Black Grouse. That's dreams for you .... creepy stuff. But .... even that longer list is incredibly small, considering how large birds loom in my thoughts...... over 25, maybe 35 years, just 10 "remembered dreams" featuring birds. But as I mentioned the first time, I only very rarely remember any dreams at all.... I'm sure you out there have had bird dreams ... maybe you've got a list, or some really odd ones .... and you could tell me about them... meantime, here's Roy Orbison and the incredibly and amazingly appropriate " In Dreams" .. I've only seen two "acts" at the Albert Hall, and both of them were Roys ... Roy Harper and ... Roy Orbison. This is because The Significant Otter was/is a big Roy Orbison Fan... when she was a teenager she saw him lots of times in village halls and sometimes bigger venues all over Ulster. This was before an " Alternative Ulster." I turned up something even better and odder as well... to be revealed laterer . Desert Island Discs was on the radio while I was having breakfast, and the deserted person was the boss of a famous Sex Shop ... I didn't hear the first bit ... maybe it was Ann Summers or something along those lines. Anyhow, I was dead pleased when her very first choice was " Girls Just Want To Have Fun " ... how remarkably appropriate ! Cyndi Lauper ... I remember seeing her do it on Top of the Pops when it first came out ... kooky. I wonder if it's on the net ... well, here she is on what I suspect is the German version of it .... So, like all us idiots desperate for summat to write about, I immediately thought ... I wonder what would be Lee Evans' first pick .... or Bill Oddie's .. or the Head Honcho of the RSPB ... or the BTO ( very staid and sensible that lot) or for that matter, the Now-Deceased Stodgy . Well, disappeared at least.Follow this link for the cause of said sad exit .. 259-the-trogs-have-a-strange-adventure.html .. or C. Packham ( environmentally-aware stuff) or Michaela ( Girls Just Wanna Listen To Chris All Day) And what about MY first pick ... bearing in mind they've all got to be linked to what we do.... not just going to the shops ... you know ... birding, Mother Nature, the little mammals and tiny insects ... that sort of thing. Not songs about brushing your teeth or your week in bed with flu ( or maybe, Flo). Anyhow ... here's Chris's top tune .. damn good song too ... .. and here's the obvious one for the boss of the RSPB ... ..and as for Lee Evans ... what else could it possibly be ... What a song that is ...far too good for him ! When they first got going, we went to see them, just to see if they were really that good... and they were. Crumbs. I'll get thinking about some more ... mine, for a start. If any of you have got a nifty and appropriate choice of song, why not let me know ... the email address is in't sidebar and there's a comment thingy down at the bottom. One thing I don't want is that awful jazz thing .. " Ornithology" by the coincidentally-named Charlie "Bird" Parker. Just an endless stream of parping to my ears. But if it's your thing, fair enough. I suppose it would be a good choice for the Head of The British Trust For Ornithology though ... ... oh no.... eek .. somehow he/she has managed to get through my security screen and he/she has put it on here .... Gawd'elp us ! Blimey ... nearly 8 parpingfull minutes of it .. parp parp parp.
It's very skillfull of course ... but so is playing snooker with a sausage roll. Parp parp parp parp parp ....... |
AuthorThat's the author up there ... I was young and sprightly then. Archives
October 2022
|