From a Tulse-fringed grot amongst the Tansy a Weed-warbler pops his tousled head to snap at a Bobfly for breakfast. His nest, hidden from prying eyes by the tall Snodgrass and thick-growing Chickflower, is but a short flight from the wood where he finds the succulent Parsley-Fly. Here is a glory of Tinkersfoot, Dwarf Umbrella, Sharkskin Bugloss, Sweet Chumbril, Duckspur, St. Anselm's -Wort and Mopsy-under-the Wall. Above, in the only Jub-Jub Tree in Soppyshire, I hear the thrilling trilling of Spavin's Spongebird, and within seconds he spreads his spurgly wings and flies away no doubt to meet his mate in her intricately woven nest of Herbert's Tangleweed and hundreds of dinky legs plucked from the abundance of the rare Boggler's Crotchbum which has invaded the nearby hamlet of Hamlet, unfortunately deserted now after all the scrofulous inhabitants were eaten by a huge flock of Jagglers, not seen in the county since 1846. Then, a few seconds later, a loud scratching noise grasped my attention, and I was soon amazed to be watching two of the only three Boswell's Snaggle-Flangers in the county, as they put on a superb display as they pranced around ,emitting their trademark" Crark-Squirk-Spodge" calls, which they repeated every 2½ seconds and gradually increased the volume as their notes dropped lower and lower ,eventually got out of breath and staggered out of sight into the 340-acres of Burke's Noseweed, renowned for their dreadful pong. Oh, if only "binoculars" had been invented ! Unfortunately, old Tom Cackhandle did make a pair, but was bludgeoned to death only minutes after he had assembled one by a 300-strong flock of Hogfart's Prattle-Craps, thought to be extinct for the last 240 years, but sadly, wrongly and inaccurately ! Good to see them back, though. Strolling back to my Crumbling Cottage, I was enthralled at the sight of the Sadbadger, and watched in awe as it devoured in a few gulps a passing battalion of Pisspot's Arse-ants, usually only seen at 25 past whatever the hour is round here. Nobody knows why, and probably never will. Hey ..what do you reckon about those 6 birds towards the end of that mysterious video?
The Geminid Meteor shower is at its peak this evening, ( 13th Dec) from about 10 pm onwards .. but, of course, it is almost certain to be cloudy/rainy/freezing cold or even all three. I'll be out there though ... despite many attempts, I've never seen a really good meteor shower. Here's two strange questions about that rather peculiar bit of "nature writing" .. Was it a rat I saw ? Do Geese see God ?
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AuthorThat's the author up there ... I was young and sprightly then. Archives
October 2022
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