Yes, yet another of my brilliant ideas has sparked a riot of controversy in the bird-feeder world. I bet you didn't know there was a " bird-feeder world" out there ... and neither did I until I came up with this ... Here we go then .... frankly, it irks me a bit that while I am out shopping or working or just maybe upstairs or whatever, the bloody birds are eating all my expensive bird food when I'm not there. That's not on. Well, I then and there invented, sui generis, the switch-off-able bird feeder. When you go out, or off, or away, beth bynnag, you just get your little zapper out, point it at the feeder and shut it down. A little hatch closes, a little slider comes down, that sort of thing. Simple, yet effective. I mean, what's wrong with that? I've told lots of people about this idea, and they seem to think it's a bit mean. Not at all ... in fact it would probably increase the amount of bird-feeding that goes on ..and here's why.... A lot of people have stopped feeding the birds because it can be expensive. So ..they don't refill them promptly, or they chuck them away. So ... the birds lose out. So .. only feeding them when you want to will reduce the cost considerably. So .... more people are likely to keep doing it. I'm sure that should such a device start to come on to the market, loads of people would object, and write letters to The Guardian etc .... but I bet they would go out and buy one eventually. Oh yes. Such is the frailty of mankind. After all, nobody objected when Winterwatch etc set the little birdies lots of problems before they could get at the food ... mazes, puzzles .... what a mean trick. So that's sorted then ..come on somebody, start making them. The world awaits. I don't want any royalties or anything. Just do it. Phew ..... nice to get that out into the ether or whatever it is. Well, I know what it is but that's another story. Scientists couldn't work out how light and other forms of radiation, which were thought to be waves, could travel through empty space ... waves need something, some "matter" to wave, if you see what I mean.... so they invented this "ether" that pervades "empty" space. The truth is, they haven't a bloody clue ! Anyhow, it's music time, recently voted the 2387th best bird-related music spot outside London .. up 3 places from last week. We're going to have a bit of Poppies and "Cam" .... I bet you never realised that the Welsh could make music like this ! ...... and, it's got a brilliant, understated middle 8 .... which they play twice. They shouldn't have chucked all that glass on Aberystwyth Beach though ........ beth bynnag = "whatever"
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AuthorThat's the author up there ... I was young and sprightly then. Archives
October 2022
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