I put the first part of this on here ages ago ..... it's from a Paul Jennings book called The Jenguin Pennings which is full of quirky little stories like this one. If you want to see the first bit .... here's the link .... (can't find it )( but I will) ( in the fullness of time) And now,even though you haven't read the first bit, here's the 2nd half of it, with a bit missed out in the middle because it rambled on a bit .... something, of course, that I never do .....so far he's been telling us about all the strange birds that inhabit his garden/house, and the parallel worlds of "men" and "birds."..........his only source of information being Severe Benson's " Observers Book of Birds" which, I would say, is not the absolute apex ! None of these are the birds I actually want to look up ( in The Observers Book of Birds ). I get diverted on to these fascinating creatures, that growl and shuffle in tunnels, while the ones I am looking up fly away.I can't help feeling that the birds we have aren't in the book anyway. We have the Telephone Bird, which makes a noise exactly like a telephone bell heard through three doors.We rush to answer it, the phone is silent, it was that bird again. The telephone Bird is a resident, 8" long, and dances at night in old pipes. Then we have the Garage Bird, found all over southern England in garages where convertible cars are kept, with perishable hoods. Even the novice bird-watcher can detect their presence, for his car looks as though it were kept permanently in Trafalgar Square. They live in garages in colonies of twenty or thirty. They eat brown paper and Scotch Tape, at least they do in my garage. I put up sheets of heavy brown paper , hanging underneath the nests, to protect my hood.. The next morning it was lying in strips on the car or hanging from the roof. The Garage Birds, which are like very small seagulls, and their fledglings, which hatch out in September and look like small vultures, were sitting on a beam, eating brown paper and growling. I have an idea they drink paraffin too. The tap on my paraffin drum is always dribbling when I come into the garage, and there is a Garage Bird fluttering drunkenly between the drum and the window. It is hard to see whether they like me or not. They must know that if there were no men there would be no garages for them to live in, and no paraffin. But they always try to make me jump, they flitter just too close to my ears in the dark garage. I wish they would go and shuffle in some tunnels. I don't think I like birds quite as close as this. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ We have the " Chimney Shuffler" in our house sometimes .... what it does is, it makes a "shuffling" noise up and down the chimney. And eventually "it" stops. We don't know whether that's for a good reason or a bad one. This song has nothing to do with all that ... except that garages are dark most of the time ... and tunnels ...this is a smashing cover of DCFC's remarkable song " I will follow you into the dark" I'll do my best, which generally isn't good enough, to find that first bit .
If any of you lot out there in the real world come across the post that is "it" perhaps you could tell me .... [email protected] ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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AuthorThat's the author up there ... I was young and sprightly then. Archives
October 2022
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